


Pretty In Pink

by Jantique



Series: The Princess Series [2]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Established Relationship, Humor, Hurt/Comfort (sort of), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-19
Updated: 2012-12-19
Packaged: 2017-11-21 14:18:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/598703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jantique/pseuds/Jantique
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve yelled, “Down on the ground; hands on your heads!”, pulled out his handcuffs—and one of the (would-be) thieves started laughing.<br/>“Oh, my Christ, Lou, wouldya look at that!”<br/>Steve swore. His boyfriend was a dead man!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretty In Pink

**Author's Note:**

> By Popular Demand. A sequel to “Uncle Steve, M.D.”, but stands on its own. But go ahead; read them both—they’re short!  
> Admittedly, this is written in a really weird style. If you hate it a lot, DO let me know, and I won’t do it again. (Maybe.) Unless two people say they like it, which I regard as Popular Demand!

After an exhausting chase, McGarrett had finally cornered the last two perps in a dingy alley with a brick wall at the end. Williams was cuffing (and booking, can’t forget to book ‘em, Danno) two other criminals two alleys back. Chin was in the office doing unmentionable things with MegaComputerTable™; Kono was somewhere doing something Awesome, and Heaven only knew where the HPD was (getting their daily intake of Kona coffee and malasadas). In other words, all was right with the world.

McGarrett drew his SIG-Sauer P226 and aimed it at the hapless villains. “Five-0! Drop your weapons!”, he shouted. They looked at each other, shrugged ( _you win some, you lose some_ ), and divested themselves of one Ruger SP101 .357 Magnum (concealed, unlicensed and unloaded; they didn’t want to get life for murder), two knives (one kitchen, one Swiss Army-knock-off), one metal nail file, a couple of crumpled tissues and a dusty Pep-O-Mint Life Saver. That was it.

Steve grinned. This was too easy. And it was. He yelled, “Down on the ground; hands on your heads!”, pulled out his handcuffs—and one of the (would-be) thieves started laughing.

“Oh, my Christ, Lou, wouldya look at that!” he pointed at McGarrett’s right arm: strong muscles, manly tattoos … and plastic bandage, where Danny had insisted on covering a small cut.

“It’s pink!”, he giggled. _Giggled_!

“It’s not just pink, Bud,” Lou pointed out, “it’s one of them Disney princesses. Cinderella, I think. Or maybe it’s the little mermaid—nah, no tail!” He was chuckling too, now.

“Aw, isn’t that cute?” Bud responded. “Maybe his little girl gave it to him.”

Lou brightly suggested, “Or maybe it was his boyfriend! Hey, you think he kissed it to make it better?!” They both burst into fresh peals of laughter.

Since the bandage in question belonged to his step-daughter, and had in fact been lovingly applied by his boyfriend (who was a _dead man_!), Steve really couldn’t argue the point. He growled at the malefactors, who didn’t have the common decency to _stop laughing_!

Steve ripped off the offending bandage. (It was Sleeping Beauty. Ignorant louts!) More giggles.

“Aw, the princess is getting mad! You don’t mind if we call you Princess, do you, Princess?” Bud cooed.

“Yes, I fucking well mind!”, Steve roared. Only _Danno_ was allowed to call him Princess! And he wasn’t really crazy about _that_!

McGarrett was extremely frustrated. Why were they not paying attention to his big, bad weapon? To relieve his feelings, he fired a warning shot at the ground between them.

And they were off! One to his left, the other to his right, streaking toward the open end of the alley. McGarrett whirled and aimed at Lou who, being on the portly side, provided a better target. He fired a warning shot into his ass. Lou gratifyingly pitched forward but Bud, heedless of his companion’s distress, kept running. (No honor among thieves.)

Fortunately, at that point Danny appeared in the mouth of the alley, gun drawn, yelling “Freeze!” and “Steve, are you okay?”

Bud froze, and Steve said wearily, “Yeah, Danno, I’m fine.” He waved a hand, encompassing the whole scene. “Take care of them, would you?”

Danny eyed him narrowly—he _would_ get the whole story, but first things first. He booked ‘em. He got their story. He got Steve’s story. He did not once laugh, or even crack a smile, the entire time. Not even tempted.

  1. He was being sensitive and understanding. Steve had been humiliated, and Danny knew how much Steve hated being laughed at.



Okay, really:

  1. It might have been just a teeny bit his own fault, for putting a Princess Band-Aid on Steve’s arm when he couldn’t find the plain ones. Although it had looked cute. And Steve _was_ a princess!



But mostly:

  1. He _really_ hated sleeping on the couch. If he laughed, it was guaranteed!



If, at some point while Steve was swimming and surfing and generally _out of the house_ , Danny locked himself in the bathroom and laughed his ass off, well, that was between him and the toilet. He got it out of his system, no fault, no foul, no couch.

So all was once again well with the world. The kicker came a couple of weeks later, when Gracie came to visit. Now Danny had told her none of what happened. He loved her dearly, but knew that she couldn’t keep a secret. BUT she held up a small box and said, “Uncle Steve, I know you lost your camo Band-Aids, and I don’t mind if you use my princesses, but anyway, I bought you a new box of camo like in the Navy.”

Steve beamed. Grace was the best! Unlike her father, who he still blamed for the Sleeping Beauty debacle!

“Grace, I appreciate that. Thank you very much.” 

And she handed him a box of camo plastic bandages. _Pink and blue camo_. Steve opened his mouth, closed it, and kept a fixed smile on his face. He wouldn’t hurt Grace’s feelings for anything.

And Danny … couldn’t help himself. He laughed his ass off (again). And yeah, spent the rest of the weekend on the couch. And groveling. And the next week doing Steve’s paperwork; letting him drive the Camaro and generally ranting. In other words, all was right with the world.

END

**Author's Note:**

> “Bud” and “Lou” are, of course, Abbott and Costello. Band-Aids still owned by Johnson & Johnson. Pink and blue camo bandages owned by Curad. Thanks to the people who wrote in and told me so. (It takes a community to make a fanfic—to make it accurate, at any rate!) I have pictures of the bandages in question, but I can’t hyperlink the damn things! But you can look up Band-Aid and Curad.  
> And remember: If you can’t say anything nice … just leave kudos!


End file.
